When Do You Know That You Are a Powerlifter?
By Marko on Mar 2, 2010 in Humor
Hi guys. First I want to apologize for this long pause. I’ve been very busy in the last few weeks so the Powerlifting Academy suffered by having no new articles during that time. I am back on track and will be eager to share some new stuff with you soon. I’m also preparing for the National IPF Championships in April. So stay tuned.
In the meantime I have some interesting stuff for you. I do not know who the author of these sentences is but these are definitely falling on your ass funny.
You might be a powerlifter if…
- The doctor tells you that you need more iron in your diet so you throw in an extra set of lock-outs!
- You check squat depth when using the john.
- When you work a desk during the day and you still have 1/2 inch thick calluses on your hands.
- You think baby powder on your thighs and chalk on your hands looks cool.
- Whenever a non-PL friend of yours moves house, or needs to move heavy things around the place, you are the FIRST person they call for help!
- You psych up before lifting your laundry basket off the floor.
- Most people in the gym don’t like you.
- You are NOT at a powerlifting gym when during your leg routine, you have all the 45’s in the gym on your own bar and a bunch of guys are watching you waiting for you to share.
- You dismount the toilet like doing box squats (to perfect that explosive power).
- You think torn track pants, an old, sweaty, filthy t-shirt advertising a garbage company, and SLIPPERS, are perfectly suitable gym attire.
- You can’t count above 5 but can multiply by 45 in your head.
- People at gym tell you someone is looking very “cut” and you think they had a terrible accident in the kitchen.
- When the word “gear” refers to squat suits, bench shirts, wraps, belts, suit slippers, salts and chalk, not STEROIDS.
- When you inhale ammonia instead of using it for cleaning.
- When the amount of weight you lift is more important than how cleanly shaven your legs are or how dark your tan is.
- When the gym owner kicks you out for bending yet another bar while squatting.
- You think a 16 oz. steak is a snack to have between meals.
- It takes 5 seconds for your spirit to re-enter your body after deadlifting.
- You think that creatine is a food group.
- You use a 1 kg plate as a paper-weight on your desk at work.
- You have baby powder in your gym bag.
- You take your weight belt off in between sets or while going to the water fountain or restroom.
- You develop “white lung” from the chalk and baby powder.
- You use the handicap stall at a public restroom for the use of the handrails on leg day.
- You are annoyed by someone using the power rack for curls, even when the gym is empty.
- You can’t understand why college wrestlers wear powerlifting uniforms.
- You have more garments in your gym bag made of polyester than is worn by the whole crew at McDonald’s.
- You think it is cool the Japanese named a national sport after your deadlifting style.
- The greeting “Good Morning” makes your hamstrings and lower back ache.
- You think of helping your neighbors move their piano as “a set”.
- You drop something, and go into a sumo stance to pick it up.
- You might be a powerlifting female if all heads turn when you squat.
- You might be a powerlifting female if you get more excited over squat shoes and new belt than you do over jewelry.
- You get accused by bodybuilders of taking steroids because you’re stronger than they are.
- You daydream of pushpressing aerobic instructors to see how high they will fly.
- You have ever used a Home Depot card to purchase “training equipment”.
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Marko are u English or Australian ?
http://steroid.blog.co.uk
Something in between…
Serbian.
This really made me crack up, favorites were
You psych up before lifting your laundry basket off the floor.
It takes 5 seconds for your spirit to re-enter your body after deadlifting.
You think that creatine is a food group.
Yeah, that one about the laundry basket is excellent but my favorite is checking the squat depth in the john.
Thanks for the comment.
I am trying hard to be a good power lifter and I think I have got many of the qualities of power lifter that you had mentioned in this post.
Good for you! Just keep on going.
“You dismount the toilet like doing box squats (to perfect that explosive power)” hahaha….great one. Nice job Marko